|Clips and Clamps
First let me say this: Erotic pain is a very individual choice. Not all of you will find this appealing. For those who do, I hope this discussion will help you increase your skill. For those who don't, it will at least provide you knowledge about the subject.
With experience and with the right person limits tend to expand. What may seem unappealing today may end up being powerfully gratifying later.
Second only to whips/floggers, clamps in their various forms are the most commonly used toys in delivering erotic pain. They can be placed almost anywhere on the body, with the nipples and genitals being the most frequent locations. This discussion is a general overview of clamping technique.
Ah, Variety! Clamps come in a variety of shapes and sizes. They can be simple everyday devices such as clothespins or paper clips, or they can be specially designed (the type you'll find in your local fetish shop). Most clamps can have their tightness adjusted, even if that is nothing more than a rubber band around a clothespin in order to make it squeeze more or less tightly. Since every submissive's tolerance to pain is difference, this ability to adjust the pressure is critically important.
Keep in mind: The more sexually aroused someone is, the more pain they can take. Once that arousal is lost, clamps just plain hurt. Therefore, only apply them if the submissive feels aroused.
Key points to remember before you apply clamps to your submissive:
Clamps hurt continuously, even if you forget about them. Unlike flogging, which takes effort on your part, once applied, clamps keep doing what they are designed to do without any other effort from you. Losing track of this is a sure sign of an inept dominant.
Clamps restrict or cut off circulation to the clamped area. Since the skin beneath the clamp is receiving little or no blood, you don't want to leave them on for too long. How long that is depends on the site you are clamping, the type and grip strength of the clamp, and how much tissue is actually pinched.
As a rule of thumb, smaller sites should be clamped for shorter lengths of time. For example, clamp nipples for 15-20 mins. Larger sites, such as the thighs, calves, upper arms, or buttocks can take longer periods, but should never exceed one hour.
The tighter the clamp, the shorter a clamp should remain in place. You would do well to experiment on yourself first to get an idea of how each of your clamps feels when used.
Applying Clamps: (Adapted from SM101 - A Realistic Introduction, by Jay Wiseman)
Take the clamp in your dominant hand and squeeze it open. With your other hand, pinch a fold of skin between your thumb and forefinger. Gradually increase the pressure until it is equal to what the clamp will be applying. Slip the open clamp over the skin and slowly allow it to close.
Warning the submissive that s/he may feel sharp pain for about 30 seconds is a good way to allow them to prepare mentally . Once you've closed the clamp over the skin, gradually release the pressure from your pinching fingers and remove your hand.
Allow the submissive a minute or so to get used to the sensation. Don't distract them. This is an important moment for them, so don't mess it up. Watch their breathing. If they relax, everything is probably fine. If not, the clamp is probably too tight. Note their muscles: if they remain tense, they are probably not aroused enough to enjoy the sensation.
No way around it, friends: They hurt coming off, especially nipples. As the blood returns to the affected part and the skin expands, pain results. This is why timing the removal is so very important, since ability to accept pain decreases as sexual arousal lessens. Waiting too long can make for an unpleasant experience.
To remove the clamp, make sure your hands are dry. Place your thumb and forefinger of your non-dominant hand near the clamped area to stabilize it. Don't squeeze. Grip the free ends of the clamp and slowly squeeze it until the pressure is completely off of the tissue. Lift the clamp straight up.
Once you begin removing the clamp, don't stop. Doing so will only make things worse. The ability to remove a clamp with a little pain as possible is the mark of a skilled dominant. Learn by practicing...beginning with yourself.
One common mistake that inexperienced dominants make is to rub the skin after the clamp has been removed. Don't do it, unless you intend to increases the pain sharply. If not, mitts off: let the tissue expand at its own pace.
Clamps On! Now What
Well...have fun! Now that your submissive is clamped, you can move on to other parts of the body. Combining the sensation of pain from the clamping with other erotic stimulation can be quite a powerful experience for the submissive. Caress them, masturbate them, have intercourse. Give them pleasure!
You can also play with the clamps themselves if you do so gradually and gently. Once you know how much your submissive can take (learned over a period of several sessions), you might try kissing or licking the tissue, sucking the clamps into your mouth, perhaps. Other suggestions:
Gently pulling clamp slightly away from body or using your fingers to increase/decrease the clamp's pressure. .Attach the clamps to something, such as his/her collar, a leash, an eyebolt, or very light weights (on the order of one to two ounces)
Logically enough, nipples are the favorite targets for our clamping. After all, it seems those small, rounded buds were perfectly designed by Nature for just such erotic titillation. There are some special considerations you should be familiar with, however, before you tighten those Clinging Claws over tender nodules:
A little pressure goes a long way here. Start off by slowly tightening the clamp, watching or asking for feedback from the sub. Some can take a lot, others very little.
Some women seem to have a direct connection between nipples and clitoris. The right amount of pressure here can translate to intense sexual pleasure, perhaps even orgasm. This is not, however, something against which you should measure your sub. If she has it, wonderful. If not, that's fabulous, too!
Men's nipples are very small in comparison with women's and require clamps specifically designed for their smaller size.
Most women experience an increase in sensitivity during their menstrual flow. Be aware and considerate.
Place the clamp behind the tip of the nipple. Clamping the tip can be excruciatingly painful and your sub will no doubt let you know in no uncertain (and loud) terms if your make this mistake.
Clamps can be placed in a variety of positions in relation to the nipple, but parallel to the body is usually the most desirable. Placing them perpendicular (sticking straight out from the nipple) can cause them to flop over under the clamp's own weight, another source of potentially very non-erotic pain.
Nipples need to be dry when you apply the clamps. Otherwise, they slip off.
Try clamping one at a time. Clamp one, move to some other part of the body and offer pleasurable stimulation, then clamp the other.
Do the same in reverse when removing them. Remove one, break for a minute or two while pleasuring another part of their body, then remove the other.
Although you'll never eliminate the pain associated with removing the nipple clamps, you can reduce it somewhat by touching and caressing the skin between the breasts with something soft. This keeps the nerves busy trying to process two signals and can inhibit pain.
Parts is Parts:
Where else can you apply clamps?
Male: scrotum (least sensitive), foreskin (varies), shaft (difficult with an erection), head (most sensitive/intense), and perineum (the area of skin between scrotum and anus - most men can tolerate this fairly well)
Female: Outer labia (least intense), inner labia (can be a fragile, sensitive area), clitoris (can you say, "Excruciating?")
Earlobes (clamping the cartilage is very painful!) .Eyebrows - careful: you are dangerously close to the eyes.
Nose (don't clamp it closed)
Chest/Breasts (other than nipple)
Arms, legs (inner thighs especially), belly, buttocks. Just about any place you can find a fold of flesh.
Clamps provide a versatile way for the dominant and submissive to further their power exchange, add a new dimension to their erotic encounters, and reach new heights in sexual pleasure. How well the experience turns out depends almost entirely upon the dominant's skill and understanding. Ease into this one and enjoy it within your submissive's limits.